To Kim K, on her birthday

Today is Kim Kardashian’s birthday. A lot of people probably don’t care, but I do.

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Kim is a woman whose body has been sexualized and demonized, degraded, an object of media scrutiny and abuse. Yet she has grown and matured, and has reclaimed her body in a beautiful and empowering way. She is artistic, elegant, and tastefully tongue-in-cheek. Her humorously self-aware approach at life is refreshing.

Kim is living proof that a woman isn’t defined by one identity — she’s a mother and a wife, but also a sexual being, a model, a business woman. She is neatly running a multi-millionaire dollar empire. She is the overlooked, underrated #GIRLBOSS.

And to return to her being a mother — Kim defies the idea that mother’s have to act and look a certain way. I think she sets a unique example for her children in that she takes pride in who she is and how she looks. She expresses self-confidence and self-love. She also often publicly displays deep love, adoration, and protection for her family. It is a connection that cannot be ignored.

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It’s important for me to recognize that Kim Kardashian is problematic. She has been known to appropriate a myriad of cultures. She is extremely privileged, so she’s had the opportunity to leave her infamous sex tape behind her. But Kim also makes an effort to educate herself and stay well-informed on important divisive topics. She has spoken out on the Black Lives Matter movement, and has endorsed Hillary Clinton for President. This demonstrates progress and understanding, which I believe the Kardashians will continue to grow and blossom into.

She is adored by few, disliked by many, but I find her endlessly fascinating. She has inspired me to take ownership of my body, to challenge others perception of me, to overshare, love fiercely, put family first, and to never take life too seriously.

You can find a million ways to fight me on my love for Kim Kardashian, but I will always view her as a QUEEN. Happy birthday, Kim K! I love you!

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#Thankful

I’m excited to announce that I think I’ve officially become a “thankful” person.

I associate gratitude with weakness the same way that people associate peanut butter with jelly, so this is actually huge progress on my journey to becoming an Actual Feeling Human Being. Emotions are real! The world is turning!

Of course, I am still a cold robot, but sometimes life gets good, like a well-written episode of Mad Men, and you just gotta ride the wave until you get paranoid that something bad is going to happen at any second and kill your vibe. While you’re riding the wave, might as well say, “Hey, this is a good thing. I feel happy about this. Thanks, Universe, for this moment in time where everything is nice.”

Anyways, how can you not at least be a little bit thankful for your life when there are things that exist out there like pugs and Harry Styles and deep-dish pizza and Sex and The City re-runs that play while you run on the treadmill? Is there really anything more you can ask for? Aside from a frozen yogurt machine that dispenses directly into your mouth with no repercussions, of course.

I don’t even know how to elegantly articulate how much I love “Blank Space” and how much I need it in my life at all times. This is also my formal plea for Taylor Swift to bring her music back to Spotify. I thought, because I don’t use Spotify, I wouldn’t be affected by this drama, but when you can’t bump “Blank Space” at a party because it’s unavailable to be streamed, it ruins literally everything. I feel so strongly about this. Please bring Taylor Swift back to Spotify.


Here it is, everybody: the most perfectly executed bitch face of all time. I want to achieve this someday. I hope in the future, my face just naturally falls into this exact look.

“Both. Just say I’ve got an allergy to cheap Champagne. Tell them exactly that. I have acid reflux, and unless it’s really good bubbles, I’m not going to take that!” He shakes his head and laughs. “But please don’t sell that too well. Make sure they know it’s a joke. They’ll really think I’m an asshole.” 


About a month ago, I made a spontaneous decision to travel from NYC to CHI via Megabus and surprise my family and friends for Thanksgiving. It was SO fun, but some of the most LOL-worthy moments occurred, surprisingly, while en route. It’s basically the travel nightmare that you would assume, but if you’re looking forward to something at the end of it, it isn’t as bad. An old Russian woman next to me got in a screaming match with the bus drivers, someone threw up within the first two hours, there was a dog on the bus, and at one rest stop, they were selling L. Ron Hubbard DVDs. Apparently, Scientology is huge in Ohio. The entire bus ride took nineteen hours, and when I finally got to my front door, no one in my family was even home, but at least I got frozen yogurt later that night and got to enjoy the well of joyful emotions that exist only in Costco stores the next day.


Per Emerson family tradition, we hit the mean streets of suburban Illinois at 3 AM on Black Friday to help the economy/get some bangin department store deals. We also were Danby Station’s first customers of the day at 6 AM, because we will do anything for food from the best restaurant in Glen Ellyn, IL. I was awake for a full 23 hours, 12 of which were spent shopping. I’m a survivor.

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Since there’s nowhere to cook on campus/I only eat rabbit food, I spend at least 90% of my time blankly staring at delicious food on Pinterest, bookmarking it and then literally never cooking it ever. But I want to drown myself in this sweet corn, zucchini, and fresh mozzarella pizza. 

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It’s a stalemate to see who will cut their hair first and neither of us are caving.

“Eve then says that we should make this T-Swift-inspired class ‘a thing,’ but alas she will be in the Hamptons next week. I will be in suburbia for the holiday weekend eating Chinese takeout and wearing flannel pajama pants, but that is neither here nor there.”


My parents came to visit the second weekend of November and it was truly a delight. We got a round of Salty Pimps at the best ice cream place in the world, Big Gay Ice Cream Shop, and also met Bradley Cooper outside of his broadway show after seeing him perform. This is truly what it means to “live the dream.”

Selena Gomez’s monologue at the beginning of this song is also how I feel about Justin Bieber. I KNOW HIM.

Maybe if you live under a rock (aka don’t follow me on Twitter) you wouldn’t know that 1D has a new album out. BUT THEY DO AND IT’S PERFECT FROM START TO FINISH. Me and my journalistic companion Kiley Roache will be having a listening session in the coming days, but you should pre-game our analysis with a little “Girl Almighty”.

“I know a lot of people are probably so thrown by how serious we’re taking this boy band, but loving them is no different than obsessing over any other act we value for some arbitrary ideal of authenticity. There’s nothing more fun than loving something, and boy bands are one of the the only sets of artists that require you to love the whole package: from music to personalities to all the baggage they can muster.”

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I think Harry Styles is calling me out via tattoo

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Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.

I ♥ New York

I’ve officially been living in Manhattan for almost 4 weeks and it’s been THE BEST THING IN MY LIFE. I basically get to do everything I’ve always wanted to do when I lived in the suburbs, which includes: walk to Soho, eat amazing food, visit my ladies at the Huffington Post, spend so much money, see celebrities, go to fun tapings, movies and concerts, and live as a strong, independent, sassy bitch. Also, I have to do a lot of school work, but don’t kill my vibe.

To be perfectly cliche, I’M LIVING OUT MY DAMN DREAMS. Hopefully soon Harry Styles will start cooking and cleaning and singing me to sleep in my dorm. Basically, anything can happen in NYC.

Here are some of my favorite things this month:


Say what you will about Kim and Kanye, but they are a POWER COUPLE and their combined style is amazing. F the haters.

“The list of things that keep me up at night includes but is not limited to: appendicitis, typhoid, leprosy, unclean meat, foods I haven’t seen emerge from their packaging, foods my mother hasn’t tasted first so that if we die we die together, homeless people, headaches, rape, kidnapping, milk, the subway, sleep.”

Buzzfeed had an accomplished bartender mix celebrity-inspired drinks. The Taylor Swift is on point.

Feeling oh so #blessed that I get to see the critically-acclaimed Whiplash at the New York Film Festival at the end of this month.

Here’s my take on the selfie: a selfie is the best kind of photo there is, primarily because you can manipulate the camera anyway you want to give you a picture that you’re happy with. People that talk shit about selfies probably just don’t know how to take a good one. Take as many selfies as your heart desires and never apologize!


Brangelina wedding is everything.


I started a new blog recapping every episode of Saved By The Bell. I only have one post as of right now (school is crazy busy) but hopefully this weekend I can get it fully up and running: http://www.bloggedbythebell.com




Last night we went into midtown, ate pizza, saw Ed Sheeran sing “Don’t” live at Radio City Music Hall (my first time ever being there!) and then basically had a night of exploring. New York City is kinda pretty I guess.


I know I blog about him a lot, but Dane Dehaan is on a different damn level as Lucien Carr in Kill Your Darlings.

Matty Healy from The 1975 is one of the most earnest and giving performers. Also he’s drunk as shit and he sounds *amaze* on one of my fave tracks, “Talk”. I swoon.

Last week I met Michael Cera after seeing his Broadway debut, This is Our Youth. It was nice. I’m in love with him.


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Tonight I was lucky enough to get tickets to a taping of the Late Show with David Letterman! They made it very clear to us that it’s a big deal to go at this point since it’s Dave’s last season, and not even they know when his last show will be. It was so funny, he’s an incredibly awesome guy, and I got to see my love Mindy Kaling in the flesh. Overall 10/10, would recommend.


“Don’t let people cast you as a side character in your relationships, in your jobs, in your life.”


Get this shit away from me.

My personal mantra

Chris Pratt is my everything, and Guardians of the Galaxy was the film of the damn summer. Don’t ever fight me on this.

Everything has changed and yet I am more me than I’ve ever been. – Iain Thomas